The opposites.

Normal behavior for noise cancelling head phone use: Put over ears in order to muffle very loud sounds for either ear protection or ability to focus.
Sam behavior: Put over ears at dinner table. Ask 398 questions in rapid sequence in a loud enough voice to hear it through the head phones. Do not stop to wait for answers or...pretty much anything.

Normal behavior for push scooter: use as a tool for getting from one place to another; balance with one foot and push with other to operate scooter.
Sam behavior: take scooter and slam onto ground to very ineffectively break ice, chalk, or any other substance found on sidewalks; use as a swing when turned upside-down and hung from a pine tree branch; quickly spin it in circles to be used as an effective weapon against the ankles of your enemies, both foreign and domestic; after going 200 yards with scooter, sit on the bottom blade and beg to be pulled by the hand grip while you "rest".

Normal behavior for dining utensils: use a fork, spoon, or knife as a tool to eat with while keeping your hands and face free from becoming soiled.
Sam behavior: use fork to flick food as far as possible from plate while eating with your fingers; find bits of food and smash against any hard surface to see "how it looks squished"; take spoon and place between 2nd and 3rd toes and do a funny dance with it for all to see; hide knife in pocket until mother leaves the table to get something from kitchen; use knife to frantically try and cut open: wires, match boxes, unscrew doorknobs, remove t.v. power button, etc.

Normal behavior for mothers of Sams: cry, yell, grit teeth, time-out, spank, etc.
Optimal behavior for THIS mother of Sam: love, love, love that kid. I sure hope he lives a long time. :)

Compassion training 101

Mom, what if YOU were a baby and someone kept pulling your hair to put it in braids?
Mom, what if YOU were that turkey and someone pulled your feathers out and tied your feet together so you would cook faster?
Mom, what if YOU were that table and someone scrubbed on you until you shined?
Mom, what if YOU were that Lego Man and someone vacuumed YOU up?

I could go on...apparently he is trying to tell me something...